I do enjoy reading a good self-care book. It’s a habit I picked up off Bridget Jones in my early twenties. I would often place a few about my flat for inspiring motivation that would bring new independence and a lust for life. I would swear off men for good after another bad date and say good riddance to chocolate and cake. But it wouldn’t be long before I was watching romantic soppy films crying into a tub of Ben and Jerry’s wondering where it had all gone wrong. How I look back on those days and laugh, if only I knew what I know now.
Today on the blog I am reviewing Making Space: Creating boundaries in an ever-encroaching world (Published 26 Dec 2019) By Jayne Hardy. A big thank you to the publishers Orion Books and the author for sending me a copy to review, always appreciated. Thank you.
Making Space: Creating boundaries in an ever-encroaching world
Boundaries and self-care go hand in hand; you can’t have one without the other. We understand the importance of self-care, but how do we protect the space within which we do it?
When we have healthy boundaries, we create a space between us and all else, where we feel safe, clear and confident in who we are and what we want and need. Our boundaries – the limits we place on what we will and won’t tolerate – define our routines, habits, choices, parenting, jobs, relationships; everything. And there’s nothing more important for our self-care.
In this practical guide, Jayne Hardy – author of The Self-Care Project and founder and CEO of The Blurt Foundation – helps us explore our existing boundaries; the ones that work for us and the ones that work against us; and guides us on creating new boundaries so that our physical, mental, emotional and digital spaces are protected.
Packed with friendly advice, the latest research and worksheets to help you reflect on your own experiences, Making Space is for anyone who feels overwhelmed, disconnected or walked on by life, and wants to make a change in an ever-encroaching world.
About The Author
Jayne Hardy is the founder and CEO of The Blurt Foundation – a social enterprise dedicated to helping those affected by depression.
Jayne lives in Cornwall with her husband, their daughter, and their dog. She has spoken, and written, about her own experiences of depression and self-care on BBC Radio 2, at TEDxBrum, and in publications such as Huffington Post, Grazia, The Guardian, and Virgin.com, to name a few.
Her innovative use of the internet to bring about positive social change was recognised from the off. She won the TalkTalk Digital Hero Award in 2011, and in 2014 was included in Marketing Magazine’s list of Top Ten Digital Mavericks. Jayne has been mentioned as one of the 19 inspirational women leading the way in mental health by Rethink as part of their International Women’s Day celebration. In 2016, Jayne led the viral #whatyoudontsee social media campaign.
Self-care is crucial in this cut-throat world we live in. Understanding its importance and how to protect the space within which we achieve this is something we should all be aware of. Hardy explores the reader’s existing boundaries, the ones that work for them and the ones that don’t. She demonstrates how to create new boundaries in a way that our physical, mental, emotional and digital spaces are protected.
Throughout this book Hardy takes the reader on a journey of re-self-discovery. We learn a little about her personal experiences and why she has written this book, along with what our boundaries are and making space within relationships, the digital age and around work. She also includes blank exercise sheets for the reader to fill in that will help them rebuild or strengthen their boundaries. It’s interesting as having it there in black and white in front of you helps you focus and begin your journey of change.
Hardy’s writing style is personal as she speaks directly to the reader. This is essential in a self-care book as the reader needs to be able to feel connected and be able to relate to what they are reading. It allows the experience to take full effect as you will be looking at your own boundaries, relationships and why you have them in place. You will feel vulnerable as you are opening up to a new way of thinking, ways to say “No” and to stop people-pleasing. With Hardy’s encouragement and positivity you feel a sense of worth as she reminds you that you are enough. It’s inspiring to see as you know she is with you on this difficult journey. She cheers you on prompting that this is your book, your way. Truly refreshing to read as such positive encouraging support is hard to come by these days.
There is so much to learn from this book. It reminded me at times of my therapy sessions and how quite often in life you need that outside perspective. I re-learned how getting enough sleep will impact your mood and behaviour. Tips on how to limit stress and time spent on my phone. To remember that I am not just a mother, that I have an identity and I shouldn’t lose it because I am a parent. Hardy is with you every step of the way and breaks it down into digestible enjoyable chunks, showing the reader why we act and respond the way we do and how we can work on changing this. It’s a learning process that leaves you feeling more than satisfied with the end results.
The chapter Making Space In The Digital Age will speak to many, if not all readers and offers interesting advice and helpful tips that will make a difference. We are constantly glued to our phones, forever looking down and scrolling. One of the many traps we all fall victim to is social media. Hardy shows the reader how what we see on the internet has been chosen, edited and filtered. That it is not real life. People choose what they want people to see so naturally you would only put up the best. Hardy peels back the layers of social media leaving it exposed and unrecognisable to the reader. You start to see the internet for what it is and stop comparing your life to others and start the process of making space, giving your mind room to breathe.
I give Making Space: Creating boundaries in an ever-encroaching world By Jayne Hardy a Five out of Five paw rating.
A burst of positive glorious energy. This book is perfect for anyone who is feeling suffocated or adrift in their day to day and wants to make a change. You need to get your paws on this. We have to start looking after ourselves, as self-neglect can lead down a very dangerous path. We need to make time and space for ourselves, to not forget that we are important and are always, always enough. Food for the mind, feed it this most delicious treat dear reader, you won’t regret it.
The Blurt Foundation Website: blurtitout.org
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